I Can't See My Self-Worth

I look in the mirror and wonder am I worth it
I sit and think, my head goes numb

I can’t seem to see what I’m worth
Because I’ve never been worth anything
The names ive been called
Are all around me

The memories that make me sick are still there
The ugly demon replacing myself in the mirror laughing at me
My fist imprinted into the glass, glass shattered

Blood falling a mess is what I made
Of my very own existence
The lies I’ve told to protect the ones I love
The pain I hide everyday
And nobody knows what’s wrong

I grab my hair and pull
Tears stream down my face
What the hell am I worth
I can’t see it anymore

Pain, I feel it
Life I see it
Hate I know it
Why the hell am I trying

What am I worth
Am I worth more than the shit
I have faced
Am I worth more than the mud on my face

Am I worth more than every lie I told
What can I possibly be worth
I am not beautiful
I’m fat, ugly, and worthless
That’s what I am

No mirror I can stand cause
I stopped seeing who I am
All I see is that demon
Laughing at me

As I slowly fall apart
And will never be the same again
So don’t ask me if I know
What I am worth

Because ill laugh and lie
But the truth is I’m worth nothing more than
That hopeless little girl crying in the corner hidding from the monsters
 under her bed that haunt her forever